The Impulse to Lie

We lie when the truth feels uncomfortable or we don’t feel we’re good enough as we are. We worry we’ll be judged by others. Ironically, lying causes internal dissonance and stress. It feels much worse and does more damage to our self-esteem. While...

Defensiveness

Defensiveness comes from a lack of self-acceptance. If someone has an issue about something we accept in ourselves, their judgments won’t sting or stick. However, if we’re constantly blaming and shaming ourselves internally, we’ll often hear the words of others as...

The Mirror of Life

Everyone we come into contact with reflects back some aspect of how we feel about ourselves. It may seem that unhappy encounters cause unhappy people, but it’s really the other way around. Grumpy, dissatisfied, negative people create interactions that match that...

The People In Our Lives

We develop deep relationships with relatively few people over the course of our lifetime. It’s no coincidence that these people are in our lives. Each one is special. Those who love and care for us obviously hold a place in our hearts, but even the ones who push...

Transparency

Imagine living your life with total transparency. Think of the things you don’t want others to know about you. Why might you feel like hiding these aspects? Perhaps you feel shame, fear of negative feedback or even worse. Or maybe you have been projecting an...

Healthy Self-Esteem

True well-being is only possible when we have healthy self-esteem. How we feel about ourselves actually affects every aspect of our lives. Feeling superior to others is often a sign of latent insecurity. Superiority and inferiority are two sides of the same coin. When...