The Downside of Strategizing

Trying to control every aspect of life is unpleasant for everyone around us and causes us to miss out on the serendipity that happens with spontaneity. When we accept what shows up, we’re in the right frame of mind to respond to life appropriately. It’s...

Live and Let Live

Though usually well-meaning, parents, siblings, friends and spouses who try to control their loved ones are bound to harvest the bitter fruit of inevitable resentment. Struggling to get others to conform to our standards is a battle with no victors. Doing what we...

Control Verses Trust

Feeling stress when life doesn’t go the way we think it should is exhausting. The need for control stems from fear. Surveying our surroundings and acknowledging how much of it we didn’t create helps us to understand that things might actually turn out okay...

Control Yourself

There are so many things in our lives over which we have no control, that it requires a skillful effort of both actively using our minds to live in balance and just letting go. We don’t control global events, others’ behavior or the tendencies and...

Can’t Change Em

Trying to change others to fit our idea of how they should be is bound to backfire. It’s a vote of ‘no confidence’ because we’re effectively telling them we don’t value who they are right now. If their behavior harms us emotionally or...

Control Yourself

It’s normal to want to control anything and everything that impacts us. A common way to exert our will is to try to change others, resist what is or complain about it. But these techniques rarely have the desired results. The only sure way to control our...