Protecting Our Identity

The fear instinct serves the purpose of guiding us away from danger or life threatening events. As we begin to develop an identity, we also begin to fear anything that endangers it. Most of us have a limited idea of who we really are, which keeps us playing small....

The Art of Depersonalization

If you make your opinions known, you’re bound to get some push back. But others reactions aren’t about you, they’re about your ideas and beliefs. Separating the two can help you to react less defensively and open to exploring their opinions as well....

Identified as a Helper?

Do you offer advice, try to fix other people and readily step in to take care of friends in need? These propensities are noble when they’re selfless, but egos can surreptitiously seek to reinforce their identities by offering their invaluable assistance....

We Create Our Experience

Our experience of life is a direct result of how we think. We are the ones who set the standards that determine if we feel lousy, just okay or great. We create our own goals and congratulate or condemn ourselves depending on whether or not we attain them. We decide if...

Identity Through Comparison

When you base your self-esteem on external conditions, you’re bound to be disappointed. There will always be someone who does it better, faster or smarter than you do. What real difference does it make if you (or they) are better at something? It always feels...