Looking for Validation

Our goals change as we move through different stages in life. When we’re young, we mainly want to fit in. Later, we become preoccupied with finding our special identity through our work or skills. As we get older, we hope we’ve ‘made a...

Opinions and Identities

If others’ opinions rile you, reflect on why. Ask yourself if their perspective threatens your sense of self. Remember that no one has an unbiased, totally accurate point of view. You might be confusing your version of reality with the actual truth, which very...

Who You Aren’t

It doesn’t really matter who you know, what you’ve accomplished or how much you’ve acquired. Your beauty, prowess and even your intelligence wane over time. Clinging to these superficial characteristics as if they hold real meaning will leave you...

Hold Identity Lightly

Our egos help us¬†distinguish ourselves,¬†relate to others and make our way in the world. But, it’s important to remember that we’ve created this image and can therefore expand, contract or change it, if we choose. Being too caught up in particular stories...

Fear and Ego

Fear isn’t all bad. The kind that warns of potential danger can be beneficial. However, fear concerned with protecting the ego robs our energy and evokes anxiety about preserving an image. Fueling concern about unwanted hypothetical outcomes not only feels bad,...

Knowing Thyself

Humans look, think, speak and act differently. This variety makes life more challenging, but it makes it more interesting, too. It’s not the diversity that creates disharmony and conflict, but fear of difference, comparison and the insecure need to feel right or...